When I was first exposed to concepts of energy healing a few years ago I’ll admit I was skeptical. The whole thing seemed a bit “airy fairy” and for people in denial.
What I’ve come to experience and trust is that energy healing actually isn’t attractive to people out of touch with reality. Who are those people? The ones attempting to bond over small talk and complaints like the day of the week. They’re core beliefs of the world are things like – Strangers are dangerous. People cheat. Money is evil and people who have it are selfish or corrupt. If I tell the truth I’ll be judged.
“The symptom is only an outer effect. We must go within to dissolve the mental cause. This is why willpower and discipline don’t work. They’re only battling the outer effect. It’s like cutting down the weed instead of getting the root out. The mental thought patterns that cause the most dis-ease in the body are criticism, anger, resentment, and guilt.” – Louise Hay
The symptom could be your headaches, pain, dis-ease, excess weight, debt, or your addiction. These are not the roots of your problem.
I’m currently in Bali to see a healer – Jimmy Doyle. A student of Louise Hay’s work and master of removing blockages and rebalancing energy with acupressure points that follow meridian lines. If you’ve been following my emails for a while you might remember the pain in my ass that was linked to a loss of power. Or the power I experienced in the words that follow “I am”. These experiences were very much influenced by the work of Louise Hay and how Jimmy supports the healing process for his clients.
Over the last six months I have been dealing with a pinch nerve-like feeling in my hip/low back. It started on my left side. About three months ago it started shifting to my right side. I thought maybe it was a slipped disc and immediately began shaming myself. How could you let yourself get in this situation? In reality, I was feeing stronger and better in my body physically than I had in a couple years.
I’m way past the days of beating myself into the ground with high intensity workouts. I’m very cautious of the information my movement gives my nervous and immune systems. I am painfully aware of my moving habits, stability, mobility, and strength. After a month of no relief the shame turned into doubt. Did I do too much? What’s wrong with my lifestyle? Maybe I don’t know as much about my body as I thought.
I started to feel like a phony. My clients raved about their reduction in pain and doing things they’ve never done before. Meanwhile I was regressing and constantly chasing pain. I visited a couple physios and corrective specialists. One said it was my left ankle. Another said it was hamstrings. The other said it was neither. Dry needling was the chosen remedy for all. I went for an x-ray and Skyped it over with my chiropractor in USA. She and the x-ray kindly reminded me of my scoliosis (completely forgot I had it) and could that really be the reason when I’ve been pain free for years?
I felt like everyone was failing to look at the whole picture and connection of these SYMPTOMS. Could I blame them? It’s my body and my life after all.
This is why I believe the bulk of your healing and wellness is not something you can depend on a doctor or specialist for. They don’t experience the thought patterns, stress load, and lifestyle that you live day to day.
They know I used to do CrossFit so the assumption is “You’re going too hard and lifting too much.”
They know I’ve been a student of Ido Portal and Fighting Monkey methods so the assumptions is “Letting your body go out of alignment is dangerous.”
They know I’m a Personal Trainer so the assumption is “You’re in the gym all day training WITH your clients.”
They know what helped me when I had a different lifestyle, stress load, relationships, and thought patterns so they assume the cause/remedy is the same.
Now let me make it very clear I am immensely grateful for the help of these specialists. Their perspectives challenged and reaffirmed my core beliefs when it comes to movement, pain, and healing. I needed their perspective to check myself before I continued to wreck myself.
I know there has been an emotional element to my pain. Recognizing my thoughts and emotions surrounding the pain, shifts, and relief, has been the bulk of my recovery. It’s not a quick remedy but the more attention I give it – those are the pain free days. This is why I made the trip to Jimmy. I knew he could support this exploration.
I was supposed to move back to USA in July 2018. The pain started when I would’ve had to give notice and start making moves on making the move. I chose to stay for the fears of finances, leaving my current clients, roommates, and lifestyle.
The pain started on my left side. The feminine side of the body where qualities of receiving and trust thrive. Pain on this side of the body relate to an issue with yourself (if you’re a woman), your mother, or a female figure in your life.
The pain shifted to my right side. The masculine side of the body where the ability to let go thrives. Pain on this side of the body relates to yourself (if you’re a man), your father, or a male figure in your life. This shift in my pain happened when my dad had another heart attack and fifth stent put in his heart with a 99% blockage.
Fear of moving forward in life. (my moving and financial fear)
Fear of trusting the process of life. (new business – what if I fail?)
Fear of my feminine energy. (women in business have to be tough)
Guilt of past relationships. (if he compliments me he’s up to no good)
Guilt of suppressing my feminine cycle (overtraining & diets in pursuit of a body that would make me “desirable” or “fit in” with the fitness industry models)
Guilt of participating in habits that contributed to my dad’s poor health. (I shouldn’t be having beers and eat like this with him)
Jimmy used pressure points, meridian lines, and affirmations to help clear guilt, resentment, anger, fear, and judgement from influential life events.
The physio was right about my left ankle being “off” when I walk. Why? To compensate for my right ankle being f*cked from holding resentment and fears of receiving love. I believe this. This was created from past beliefs about relationships I carried at the time. Jim was able to push on my right ankle and identify I had an issue with receiving love from males and an injury to my ankle around the same time in life. He was spot on. Ten years ago was the start of my most toxic relationship and I lightly fractured my right ankle around the same time. He pushed on my ankle with one constant pressure while having me repeat affirmations about receiving love and forgiveness. I can’t even describe the release that came over me.
Then we moved to my neck. The right side of my C-3 vertebra where guilt and martydom issues with my dad’s health live. “I am responsible only for myself”
Then we moved to my shoulder. A tingling knot I’ve had ever since I can remember – gone. This spot is a hot zone for the body communicating, Get off my back! “I choose to allow all my experiences to be joyous and loving”
Then we moved to my stomach and spleen. The belief “Life is sweet and so am I” grows here. As a women standing almost 6 feet tall it can be hard to show feminine emotions. Big girls can cry too dammit! I’m allowed to be sweet to myself and hold space for my own emotions as much as I do for my clients, friends, and family.
Then we moved to my abdomen/uterus region. I’ve leaned towards my masculine traits since childhood. I did as a collegiate athlete and again as a business woman in the Middle East. My reconnection with my cycle over the last year after major physical, digestive, and mental stress has encouraged me to share my health knowledge with other women. Connecting with them has been powerful. I fully believe in this affirmation and cycle tracking for getting over the fear of trusting the process in life. “I love and appreciate myself. I love being a woman.”
I could go on an on of all the thoughts Jimmy and I were able to clear in just an hour. What I’ve noticed over the last few days when the pain occurs on the left side, I am in a moment of mistrust or resistance to receiving. When it happens on the right, I find myself in a moment of wanting to assume responsibility for someone else. I change my thought to a relevant affirmation and the pain almost instantly disappears. This morning I went down to the beach to move and found myself in positions I haven’t been able to reach in months. I wanted to cry it brought me so much joy!
Here’s the thing with affirmations: they don’t have to be true RIGHT NOW to work. If it describes something you’d like to create in your life then plant the seed. By saying it, you’re planting the thought to create and grow in your life.
If you’ve got nagging pain or dis-ease pay attention to thoughts recurring in the day. Ask yourself if it’s a thought you’d like to create in your life.
If you need help let me know. Elements of Louise’s influence are sprinkled throughout my new program, Wellness Uncovered. Learn more about it here
Grab yourself a copy of Louise’s book Heal Your Body here!
Email Jimmy if you’re keen to have a session – firstname.lastname@example.org
Makasih (thank you) Jimmy, Louise, Bali, and each one of you!